used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
