...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
