Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
