hell yes lets make some ravioli
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
