i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
