Dual....:-)
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
