if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Randomize