my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
