he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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