Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just want to make out with him forever
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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