Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
