Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
