Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
