and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
