Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
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