Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
