do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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