yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
