I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
