oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I look better un-naked...
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
