We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
did i just pee glitter
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
