walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I AM VODKA MAN
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
