Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
