You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
