I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
