I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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