you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
