Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
