How'd it feel making her break her religion?
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
