Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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