things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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