There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
