Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
