Will you blow on my dice?
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
