Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Randomize
