I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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