In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
