Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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