Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
