Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I am mentally ready for anal.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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