she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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