he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
