He is such a slut. More and more my type.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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