new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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