Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
