woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
