OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
