Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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