Kiss
Puke
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
ttyl tear gas
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Randomize