I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
There are leaves in my underwear?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
